Saturday, 1 October 2011

A Good Woman is Easy to Love

I love it when older women come good. I love it when they find success or a new heart-throb or a fabulous dress, especially when they have had a rotten run or spent their lives shovelling pasta or trimming roses.

I feel rather stupid saying this but the recent Demi Moore/Ashton K blow-up (which I'm not going to pretend not to know about) makes me feel the inverse of this, meaning sadder. For a while it was all Cougar Town and power to the old girls, but if you look carefully, it all happened in the wrong way, and was never anything other than skin-deep and a marketing curve. There was never any real revering of the older gal, it was a galling push against gravity, a bit of smut and throwaway twenty-year-olds on the side.

Even if I think of chic Madonna with a boy just older than my eldest son I think Eeek! What on earth would they talk about? What is the real substance of this? Not that my sons are unintelligent, or crude, or incapable of decent conversation. But they are just - different.

In my book my heroine tries her hand at both - young and saucy, older complicated and not-altogether wiser. I wanted to show how a woman of a certain age can have the power to shop around, and should do! Shopping around definitely has its upside and terrific moments (especially if one includes Italian shoes). No?

And yes like everyone over 40 these days I have girlfriends who have young guys, even guys you can sense are old at heart and have taken off the tinted glasses, or don't mind standing together in strong light. I admire these couples for what I assume they are stating - We are lovers, We don't give a stuff, We are good together. Hats off to them. But I can't help wondering whether there is sadness in the wings, or up ahead and not too far off either.

Probably the only way to get around this one is the way a seasoned Susan Sarandon does in the remake of the film Alfie, when she dumps a disbelieving and delicious Jude Law. Do take note:

But why!? Alfie asks.

Because, Liz replies, I've found someone... younger.


  1. Such a good post, m'dear.
    I can't wait to read your novel.

  2. Thank you MSB! Tante grazie. I hope you'll soon be holding it in your hands.

  3. Twas ever thus sadly. Francesca Annis and Ralph Fiennes, Susan Sarandon and Tim Robbins . . .

    But yes, let's focus on we come good.


  4. I enjoyed this post. I can't wait to read your novel, it sounds like it's going to be a good read.

    I love Susan Saradon. Such a fab actress.

  5. My sister-in-law married a younger man who looks and sounds eerily like Ashton Kutcher. I couldn't deal with the insecurity, personally; I'd always be trying to sit with my back to the window.

  6. Thanks so much Rebecca! I think we are nearly at the end of it. I can't wait either! Ciao cat

    Yes Averil I'm sure I'd be the same. I think I'd rather be celebrating my lines.

  7. When I was away this weekend, my best friend and I were accosted by two married men. After we left (them not taking the hint to leave), it occurred to us that we had become the safety choice. They talked to us because we were no longer hot, young things. It was a very strange feeling.

  8. Can't wait to see the Susan Saradon and Jude Law movie, and am looking forward to your pieces on TVFH.

  9. Yes Lyra but we all know there's HOT and the much more sensual h o t. Right?

    Hi Kathleen and thank you for joining. I'll check yours too. Yes, very glad to be with TVFH, they've published a few of my stories and always have very timely and informative articles. Mike does a great job! ciao cat

  10. Much more sensual h o t...yes! I can completely get behind this concept.